Did you lie under oath, Mr Cohen?
Yes.
Why did you do that?
To protect Trump, and because I'm a self-serving little prick. Doing whatever it takes to serve Trump's corrupt interests is how you prove you're a good soldier, and stay in his good graces.
What happened?
I went to prison.
Are you lying now?
No.
Why should we believe you?
Because I'm not protecting Trump, I'm still a self-serving little prick, and I don't wanna go back to prison, so I'm never gonna lie under oath again.
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