On Being Coloradan

I grew up hearing "Coloradoan". But according to most sources, where they know a lot more about that kinda stuff than I do, "Coloradan" is correct for people living in a place that has a Spanish-origin name. (drop the 'o' and add 'an')

I think adding the 'o' makes it sound a bit more lyrical, although that's probably just because I was raised by a buncha dumbass dirt farmers or something.

And it's very likely that adding the 'o' is just another example of how Gringos adopt - and then bastardize - Spanish language words.

• la riata (a rope used to catch cattle) becomes "lariat"
• Buena Vista is pronounced Byoona Vista (We who call ourselves Coloradoans insist on the incorrect version, and will make fun of you for saying it right)
• The Huerfano River comes out of my grandpa's mouth as "The Wore-fuh-nah"

• The Colorado state religion is dogs.
• No, it’s not an oyster.
• For wheeled transport, the party going up hill has the right of way. Same for foot traffic -  for reasons unknown.
• If it rains you must say ‘we needed this.’
• Never buy a house with a north facing driveway.
• Green chile belongs on everything - no exceptions.
• Check List: Nightstand chapstick. Desk chapstick. Car chapstick. By-the-TV-remote chapstick. Bathroom chapstick. Kitchen chapstick.
• Never ski wearing jeans.
• You must own a minimum of 5 water bottles - steel, not plastic.
• We dress in layers here - and not because we think it's fashionable.
• Purchase of a Subaru or Toyota is mandatory within one year of residency.
• Never date someone with a Ski Pass different from yours.
• Allow 3 hours to get to a mountain 1 hour away.
• Don’t pet anything in Estes Park.
• Never plant anything outdoors before Mothers Day.
• Always carry layers, flip flops, and an extra blanket.

Anna Connelly

Deliberate ignorance don't cut it.

Cops

There's something very wrong with the cops.

The Flop

At least half of all the traffic we see online - half of all the "users" we encounter - are bots. They're not real.

Aaron Parnas

What will the history books tell us about what's going on now?

Always the big question.

Belle

Some great points.

• If it's not really valuable, don't start a war over it
• The MOU has been signed "digitally"? Y'mean, like an autopen kinda thing?
• If it's a real deal, then let's see it

Trae Crowder

Overheard

A short lesson

In 1861, Charles Darwin wrote in a letter to a friend:

"But I am very poorly today, and very stupid, and hate everybody and everything."

We can have extremely shitty days, and still rise to do great things.

Overheard

Human Body:

In about 9 months, I can grow an entirely new human being, complete with a brain, and bones, and skin, and eyeballs, and fingers and toes - the works.

Me:

Cool. How long before my back starts to feel better?

Human Body:

Forever - that's just you now - get used to it, loser.

Erika Jordan