Philosophy Explained

Heraclitus - You can't eat the same donut twice

Plato - A donut shares its ideal donut-ness with all other donuts

Aristotle - A donut's donut-ness is self-contained

Augustine - A donut must achieve grace to become fully donut

Descartes - The donut hole proves the existence of the donut

Locke - Donuts taste good to me

Hume - Donuts exist because I imagine donuts

Kant - Each donut equals my total donut experience

Wollstonecraft - Women deserve donuts too

Mill - Donuts are good if they make people happy

Kierkegarde - I have faith in the deliciousness of donuts

Marx - Everybody deserves a donut

Nietzsche - Stop at nothing to get your donut

Saussure - Beignet/Krapfen/Ciambella/Buñuelo: they are all equally donut

Wittgenstein - Fried pastry, zero, spare tire, whatever

Beauvoir - White patriarchal domination is responsible for the shape and the self-defeating inadequacy of the donut