Today's John Oliver

Keynote: Preventing Cable Company Fuckery

And it worked - kinda:

This Thursday, FCC Chair Tom Wheeler will announce that under Title II, broadband companies will be regulated as utilities. Real progress, and we should be grateful to Wheeler and President Obama for listening to the public as we made our wishes known.

It's not the same as putting rules in place that make it illegal to create tiered pricing structures, but at least it gives average jokers like me and you a way to verbally assault the Suits and the Nickle Humpers as they proceed to ease their bullshit ownership paradigm into place.

Stay after 'em.

hat tip = Crooks & Liars

The Prophet Charlie Pierce

I posted something a while back that said I wanted to hear more from Jim Webb.  I haven't completely changed my mind on that one, but I'll say straight out this ain't what nobody needs to hear nobody say no how.  

"I think they could do better with white, working people and I think this last election showed that," Webb said, referencing the 2014 midterms where Republicans took control of the Senate and added more power in the House. "The Democratic Party could do very well to return to its Franklin Roosevelt, Harry Truman, Andrew Jackson roots where the focus of the party was making sure that all people who lack a voice in the corridors of power could have one through the elected represented...You are not going to have a situation again where you have 96% of the African American vote turning out for one presidential candidate. ... We need to get back to the principles of the Democratic Party that we are going to give everyone who needs access to the corridors of power that access regardless of any of your antecedents. I think that is a fair concept." --Jim Webb

Take it, Charles:

There is no question that the Democratic party has done a god-awful job of explaining to white working people who's screwing them and why. Most of the people who have tried that have found themselves marginalized, and not always by Republicans, either. Senator Professor Warren is one of the few of them who has managed to explain these matters in such a way that they are both easily understood, and in such a way that she doesn't sound like she's talking down to anyone. And she still has a long push up a dirt road before she moves the political dialogue to the point where white working class voters actually act on what she's saying to them. Sooner or later, it's up to the voters to decide to stop being stupid about their own self-interest, and to stop falling for scams about how the Poors and Browns are the ones stealing all their money.

It's hard to say some of the things Webb is trying to say, and to make it all understandable in a way that prevents about half of the audience from immediately putting buckets on their heads and running around crashing into walls and shit.  

We gotta find candidates who don't just have the guts to say the things that are hard to say; but candidates we can count on to figure out how to say those things in ways that let us understand the core truth while not making us feel threatened or guilty or lied to; and who aren't just pandering to one group or another, trying to manipulate the crowds, etc etc etc.

One of the first things Webb's team has to figure out is that no matter what he says, he's speaking from a position deep inside the Dominant and Over-Privileged power structure.  

So say what you're saying, Mr Webb, but I gotta call that shit strike one - you're not going anywhere if you don't say it way better'n that.

Darwin Implied

I'm not the only one who was left wondering if the the Xtianist Radicals would get their dander up over the Carnival ad yesterday, but Ken Ham's the only one I've heard anybody even refer to.  So OK - maybe we just have to wait a while longer for the obligatory outrage to build(?)  

Addicting Info beat me to the blog.



The problem is that JFK got the facts wrong when he tried to make the biology connection between humans and the sea, so of course that makes the whole Darwin thing just some atheist bullshit.

Addicting Info posted this as a follow up:

Today's SNL

American "culture" is a curious thing - all 'round.

The Amazing Randi

James Randi announced his retirement:

At 86 years of age, I feel that it’s now well time to officially retire, so I’m stepping down from my position with the JREF – the James Randi Educational Foundation.

This doesn’t mean that I’m retiring from my battle against the so-­called psychics, faith healers, paranormalists, and the assorted frauds I’ve encountered in my worldwide wanderings. I’ll in no way relax the critical attention I’ve given to them over the last busy 73 years, I promise you. I’ll still lecture and write, here and abroad – but now on my own time – not on the exhausting schedule that I’ve had these past few years.

Here are some resources to help you create your very own Junior Bunkum Buster Kit:

What's The Harm?

Quack Watch

Pusware QuackCasts

The most important tool in your kit (imo) is the Randi Challenge:

The James Randi Educational Foundation will pay US$1,000,000 (One Million US Dollars) ("The Prize") to any person who demonstrates any psychic, supernatural, or paranormal ability under satisfactory observation. Such demonstration must take place under the rules and limitations described in this document. An applicant can be from or in any part of the world. Gender, race, and educational background are not factors for acceptance. Applicants must be at least 18 years of age and legally able to enter into binding agreements.

Have fun - and let's be skeptical out there.

hat tip = Wonkette

Whoa, Dude

I hope I'm not the only one who thinks it's a tiny bit over the top (or weird, or even creepy) that companies are running TV Ad Trailers - teasers for the ads they plan on running during the Super Bowl.

Youngsterism

Californina is making an effort to raise the age at which it's legal for people to buy tobacco products from 18 to 21.

I remember, way way back in the day, when we were all blabbing about "how it ain't right for  kids to get drafted at 18 and have absolutely no say in electing the slaggards who're sending them off to die in some place they can't even pronounce...".

We got Amendment #26 outa that one.

So let's consider for a minute that raising both the drinking age and the smoking age to 21 is a really good idea.  People's brains aren't terribly well developed until they hit their mid-20s, which is why we should be moving some of those BFD Life Decisions a little further towards that maturity threshold.  (If you can get your kids not to take up cigarettes (eg) before they turn 21 or 22, the chances that they'll stay non-smokers for life go up something like 300 Jillion percent.)

Now, since we're making these changes in order to protect our kids from the evils of nicotine and liquor, how about we take one more step and move the Age of Enlistment up there too.  You're not gonna convince me that joining the US military is somehow safer for the average 18-year-old than just about anything else thay might try - especially since the first 6 months in the military is the period when a ridiculous buttload of kids get introduced to, and then hooked on, all manner of unhealthy habits.  Yes, this happens in college, and yes, it happens to plenty of kids who go to work right out of high school, but the numbers are  higher for those in the military.

Which lands us smack in the middle of the intersection of Obvious and Wise-The-Fuck-Up: not many college freshman and shoe clerks are getting shipped back into Iraq, or off to Afghanistan or whatever Shit-hole-istan is next on our list, so let's acknowledge the fact that just being in uniform is inherently more dangerous than not being in uniform.  And guess what - it's not just more dangerous for the kids; it's more dangerous for everybody to have kids in uniform wandering around with automatic weapons and hand grenades (fucking duh, muthuhfuckuhs).

Or maybe we could just try to be a little more consistent with some of this shit for a change.

Sunday Tunes

Let There Be Love (cover) Laura Fygi

Night Train --Rickie Lee Jones

North Dakota --Lyle Lovett w/Rickie Lee Jones

Early Mornin' Rain (cover) --Eva Cassidy

I Gave My Love A Candle --Bonnine Raitt

Someone To Watch Over Me (cover) --Amy Winehouse

At Last (cover) --Beyonce

Precious --Annie Lenox

I Only Wanna Be With You (cover) --Shelby Lynne

My Opening Farewell (cover) --Alison Krauss

That Was Then And This Is Then Again

  

Know Your Shit

Here at the end of White History Month which (paraphrasing Tim Wise) goes by the clever name of March-thru-January, we should oughta maybe not concetrate only on the Black History part, but make sure we look at the other side and examine our own shit a bit more closely.

It All Comes Down To Money

Money's what matters.

From Zach Carter at HuffPo:

Next week, the House will consider a bill to amend the Unfunded Mandates Reform Act of 1995, which then-Speaker Gingrich (R-Ga.) shepherded through Congress. The 20-year-old law imposed a host of cost-benefit standards on federal regulators, including a requirement that they consider the costs that new rules might impose on state and local governments. But in order to garner Democratic votes and protect against a presidential veto, Gingrich made a significant concession: The regulators' calculations could not be challenged in court.

--and so-- 

"Cost-benefit analysis has been and will continue to be a blueprint for big banks to water down, dilute and block Wall Street reforms," warned Amit Narang, regulatory policy advocate for Public Citizen. "The bill ensures that if financial agencies adopt reforms based on cost-benefit analyses that do not reflect Wall Street preferences, big banks will be waiting in the wings with a lawsuit to overturn the rule."

So on one hand, it kinda looks like they just wanna "play fair" and make sure that all those poor hardworkin' Uber Ethical Biz-Fucks can enjoy access to the courts on the same footing as all those dirty fucking hippies who use Da Gubmint to steal the money I've earned by the sweat of by own brow, just so they can turn around and give it to some Welfare Queen blah bah blah. Or maybe they'll sell it as making sure all three branches get a chance to weigh in on the effects of legislation.  That's all horseshit, IMHO.  It's never really about what they tell us it's about.

Regulation is a key component in any form of device, organism, organization, system, et cetera ad nauseum ad aeternam.  I've hit on this point before, but it's a good one to remember.  The analogy is that without my pancreas to regulate it, my blood sugar goes nuts and while I have a pretty good time for a little while, I'm in sugar shock in a coupla days and I'm dead by this time next month.

What these guys want - "guys" meaning the embedded weevils congressional staffers who work for Monsanto and ExxonMobil and Raytheon, but get paid by suckers like me and you - what they want is another way to exempt their shadow employers from rules that they tell us are oh so very important to maintain "law and order".

So that's the dodge.  We've been almost perfectly conditioned to think government is always and only bad.  If you buy into that, then it follows naturally that pretty much anything that helps Public Governance has to hurt Private Enterprise.  Which is exactly what we end up arguing about, instead of recognizing that it's really "rules for you but not for me".

Right now, once the Regs have been vetted by the Cost-Benefits thing, and they get put in place, you can't challenge them in court - that's not great because we get some really weak shit regs to begin with, but at least Goldman Sachs can't challenge them either.  So fuck that. What's the point of having all this money if I can't just buy the government that all my rich friends keep telling me I deserve?

As usual, Coin-Operated Politicians who already play us like a cheap kazoo are pushing to turn the whole thing over to a Judiciary that's all but bought and paid for now too.  It costs a good chunk o' change to slug it out in court.  Do you suppose Halliburton might have some small edge when you need the courts' help because your well water is now usable as a fuel for your backyard grill?

While we've been distracted, taking the rhetorical beatings because of ridiculously successful creations of Straw Man crap like the Nanny State, the "conservatives" have been busily installing The Daddy State.  The loop is closing apace.

Find The Time

2 1/2 hours of the good stuff for a cold and crappy Saturday

Solo Accoustic Live --Jackson Browne

Today's Professional Left Podcast

Another good one, guys.

Friendly reminder:  This shit's free. Send 'em a little card and 5 lousy bucks, ya fuckin' moochers.

The Professional Left Podcast

PO Box 9133

Springfield, IL 62791

--or--

Do it with PayPal at their site:

The Professional Left

God Love The Onion

My Recent Discovery

I've been reading Charlie Pierce for years, and he often makes reference to "Obvious Political Anagram, Reince Priebus".  I've always wondered, but I never looked very far trying to find out about it.

I swear to Zalmoxis that I didn't know this until today, when I Googled it and found a Facebook page explaining it all*:

Reince Priebus = Rube's Epic Rein

No wonder they keep re-electing the guy.

*Ed Note:  I can't guarantee this is what Mr Pierce has in mind, but - you know - holy crap.

Told Ya

A coupla days ago, I posted a bit about the Great Gathering of Grifters aka: Kaptain Kornball Klub, aka: The Iowa Freedom Freakout Summit.  And in that post I opinionized about how certain of the "candidates" were there for reasons other than Public Service.  Well - imagine my surprise when I find out that there are people out here in the Blogoshpere who do more than just opinionize - they actually look into this shit.

Last week, Mother Jones reported that Mike Huckabee used his PAC to funnel more than $400,000 to his family. This week, Politico’s Ken Vogel gives us a story about scammy conservative PACs that make thousands of dollars from home with just one weird trick. These “scam PACs” play fast and loose with federal election rules by claiming-but-not-quite-claiming to represent Tea Party favorites like Ben Carson, Allen West, or Donald Trump’s hair plugs. The catch is that almost none of the money these scam PACs raise goes to those candidates. It’s the political equivalent of selling beachfront property in North Dakota, and because it’s politics, it’s somehow not fraud. ‘Tis truly a blessed time to be a conservative grifter!

Aha!  I posted mine 2 days ago, and then all of a sudden, there it is all over the place.  Post hoc ergo propter hoc, muthuhfuckuh.  Well, Ok, except for that 'last week' thing.  shit

You're welcome, Wonkette - glad I could help. Please keep doing that part of my job for me.

The Explanation

It seems so obvious.  Maybe that's why I need a reminder once in a while.



hat tip = Democratic Underground

A Mighty Metaphor

Jon Stewart having fun mocking the Press Poodles is nothing new - and also something that never gets old.  

The Daily Show
Get More: Daily Show Full Episodes,The Daily Show on Facebook,Daily Show Video Archive

But what really comes to mind is the Clauswitz bit - paraphrased for my purposes: A good plan for your news show can survive anything except contact with actual events.

But the suits are in charge now, so "actual events" - aka: Reality, aka: The-Fucking-Truth - none of that matters if it's in conflict with The Plan.

Management made enormous commitments and invested at great expense to come up with The Plan, and Management is never wrong.  We must stick to The Plan - The Plan is everything because fuck you, we'll drop you like a bad habit, that's why.

Of course, Stewart says it a lot better.

Unintended Truth

Some of those dirty fuckin' hippies have been trying to tell us for a pretty long time about how the "political center" has moved way to the right over the last 30 years, and practically everybody I know either shrugs it off or tells me I'm a fool for believing the left-leaning media which we all know has a wicked librul bias.

But then, along comes Steve King making a bit of a slip as he introduces Moose-alini at the annual meeting of the Kaptain Kornball Klub in Iowa.  

This turns into the Mother of All Word Salads as it appears Palin tries it without the teleprompter, but listen close in the first few seconds:



Yeah, I know - I couldn't stay with it either.  After the first few minutes, it's like you can hear your brain cells screaming as they start to die.

BTW - everybody and his fuckin' uncle is running on the Repub side so far, and I think it might be because the rubes' pockets aren't quite as deep as they used to be - having nuthin' at all to do with stoopid GOP economic policies of course - so you have to show up and do some of the huckstering in person - gotta work 'em a lot harder than just a coupla years ago.

I'll go out on what I consider a very short limb here, and I'll say that everybody not already positioned to get rich by holding an elected office is in this thing to boost their mailing lists, bolster their networks of "supporters", and make it all pay off by hittin' up every yokel for a generous donation...cuz that's what most of these jag-offs are - they're panhandlers; they're fuckin' moochers playin' every sucker for every dime, every chance they get. And boy has it been a good long run.

hat tip = Little Green Footballs

Today's Pix