Overheard

Every loaf of bread is the tragic story

of large numbers of individual

kernels of grain that could've become

a soothing adult beverage

had they only been given the chance.

Overheard

Stephen Miller is what happens

when you bury a dildo

in the Pet Sematary.

Overheard

At the grocery store today, I saw a guy dragging a screaming, kicking child across the parking lot.

He saw me looking intently at what he was doing. He stopped, and said, "He's mine - if I was kidnapping a kid, do you really think it'd be this little prick?"

Overheard

We were given the perfect planet, abundant with fresh clean water, clear air, forests of tall trees and plains of grass - filled with sunshine, wildlife, berries and beauty - but we decided what the place really needs is plastic, predatory capitalism, and wars of conquest.

We are the stupid animal.

Overheard

Too much talent

is trapped in poverty

while too much mediocrity

is very well-funded.

Overheard

Crystals for use in banishing someone:

Any of them will do if you have a good arm

and you throw them hard enough.

Namaste, motherfuckers.

Overheard

Poverty is not a shortcoming of the poor.

It's the failure of a government owned by the rich.

Overheard

It sucks to live at a time

that makes wrongdoing feel normal,

while doing the right thing

is considered outdated.

Overheard

The most important shift in our lifetimes is the effort to decouple 'subsistence' from 'employment'.

If we don't address this with some kind of Universal Basic Income and Universal Healthcare, then the rise of AI won't lead to a 'golden age of abundance' - it will become a crisis of survival.

Overheard

I was okay with

• all the stealing
• conflict of interest
• war crimes
• pedophile protection
• cheating on all 3 wives
• hush money paid to silence Stormy Daniels
• falsifying business records to hide those hush money payments
• election interference
• the murder and detainment of US Citizens by ICE
• illegal possession of classified documents
• inciting the January 6 insurrection
• the Trump Organization tax fraud conviction
• the emoluments clause violations
• his nepotism in appointments
• obstructing FBI investigations
• wire fraud via PAC solicitations
• the perjury in election challenges
• unlawful possession of government records
• the firing inspectors general without notice
• using DOJ for political prosecutions
• violating Posse Comitatus by sending the Military against US citizens

...but $5 diesel - well that's just too damn far.

Sound Advice

Be kind. You don't know what people are going thru - what special burdens they're under.

So instead of telling them to fuck off,

have a little heart.

Ask them, "How can I help to fuck off today?"

Overheard

People tell me I'm such a downer because I've got nothing but bad news all day every day.

So, OK - I hear you. And every now and then I want to be of some comfort to my friends and loyal readers, so here's a bit of good news:

Things are great today -

compared with

what's coming tomorrow.

Happy now?

Overheard

If it was actually possible for women to sleep their way to the top, women would be running the whole goddamned show by now - you dumbass.

The far more likely reality is that men have been engaging in sexual extortion, withholding the rewards and promotions women have earned in order to get sex.

Overheard

Atheism is what happens when you read the bible.

Christianity is what happens when somebody

you don't know reads it for you.

Read your bible.

Overheard

Imagine being so foolish that you look at that guy -

a treacherous, treasonous, totally corrupt

self-dealing, ignorant buffoon -

a racist, semi-literate dumbass -

a sexually assaulting, pathologically lying

feeble-minded, morally bankrupt

constitutionally ignorant simpleton -

this bloated nitwit, with his piss-colored cotton candy hairdo,

and skin that looks like radioactive slag,

obese, disheveled, and sitting in his own shit -

imagine all that, and thinking,

"Now there's a guy I can admire.

I want my kids to grow up and be just like him."

Overheard

I hope Obama wears the tan suit

at Trump's funeral.

Overheard

We accept corruption, sex crimes,

and murder-by-government

from the Republicans.

And reject healthcare, decency, and

a square deal

from the Democrats.

You are nine kinds of fucked up, America.

Overheard

When the governor says our rights are being violated

and the mayor says our rights are being violated

and the lawyers are saying our rights are being violated

and federal judges are saying our rights are being violated

and the police chiefs are saying our rights are being violated

and the local cops are saying our rights are being violated

but DHS - the assholes who're doing all the violating - insist they aren't ...

maybe our rights are being violated

and maybe our government is nine kinds of fucked up.

Overheard

Zoologists are reporting that bats

are now using the phrase

"Trump shit crazy"

Overheard

We're not the land of the free right now

so we have to be the home of the brave.